Judith's Jottings » Blog Home Page
The missing piece of the decluttering jigsaw - 21st February 2024
These days it's easy to find a decluttering expert online, or buy multiple books on the subject. You can even watch it happening on TV. Have you ever felt though that the more you read, watch or listen to on this topic - the harder it gets to actually DO any decluttering?
The honest truth about decluttering is that the process itself is ultra simple.
1. Identify what you no longer want
2. Remove those items from your home
That's pretty much it!
Of course if decluttering really was this simple then I would never have a client or give a talk and have an audience, nor would there be any need for books on this subject.
My point is then that the practical side of decluttering CAN be easy - but only when you are mentally and emotionally ready to let go of your excess possessions. THIS is why people get stuck with clutter. This is why clutter continues to accumulate even when a person knows that they already have too much stuff.
So how DO you get to a point of being mentally and emotionally ready to declutter?
This is primarily about uncovering the unhelpful beliefs you have in your subconscious - and releasing them. When you release unhelpful beliefs you can also work on establishing new beliefs that feel nurturing. Beliefs that support your wellbeing AND your decluttering.
In addition to working on your beliefs you will most likely need to release some emotions that you have held back. Often my clients apologise to me if they feel a bit tearful. I always tell them that tears are good, they are a sign of release. Don't you always feel better after crying? Tears release adrenalin apparently, so no wonder they have such a beneficial effect on us.
This is why I often speak about head clutter. Most people who have home clutter also have head clutter. Think of head clutter as the voice in your head that sounds a bit bossy and unkind and tells you what you have to do. It also tells you what you must never do! Hence you will think you can declutter something you haven't used for ages and then the voice pipes up, "You can't get rid of that!" and it likely tells you that it was a gift from your granny or something similar!
Clients who feel hugely stuck with their emotions normally have better decluttering success if they begin by addressing their head clutter. Otherwise they struggle to let go of things - every item in the charity bag is a massive act of willpower and honestly, decluttering does not need to be this difficult or challenging.
Grab a pen!
Write a list of all the things your internal voice tells you when you start thinking about decluttering. The instructions it gives you might be about decluttering in general, or it might be specific to certain items. So all you need to do is imagine taking something to the charity shop or putting it in the recycling - then you will hear the voice! Jot down what it says and when you have a few phrases in a list have a short break. When you get back I suggest looking at the list with a view to identifying what belief the voice has about your imagined actions.
Once you've identified the unhelpful beliefs you can put your mind to writing out some new beliefs to counter the voice. Write down the new beliefs and make sure you read them aloud every day with great enthusiasm. After a while you can try to declutter one or two items. If that voice pipes up again you can silence it with your new belief. This entire process might take a while but when you get to a place where you at least understand that those unhelpful beliefs are NOT you then you will soon be decluttering.
I can support you in this process
If you struggle to identify the unhelpful beliefs and/or feel like your internal voice is too powerful then think about one or more coaching sessions with me. Sometimes it's necessary to engage with the bossy voice in addition to repeating those preferred new beliefs. Remember, that nasty voice has probably been with you for your entire life. It might not give up without a fight and that's fine, quite normal.
I've learned this process from my own coach and have been practising it since 2019. It definitely helps me make better decisions that are kind to me. The results can feel so liberating - I would love to share this with you!
Send me an email or message me via my Organised Chaos FB page to find out more about coaching and arrange a complimentary 30 minute chat with me.
Keywords: head clutter, emotions
Click here to go back to the blog index
