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Overwhelm - one way to feel stuck with decluttering - 14th January 2025
This is the first of three blog posts on the subject "What keeps you stuck with your clutter?" Hopefully these posts will help you unstick yourself so you can make decluttering progress!
Overwhelm and its power to stop you in your tracks
In 2015 I experienced adrenal exhaustion and symptoms persisted for a long time. This period was one of extreme overwhelm for me and I chose the image for this post as the best graphic I could find to sum up how I felt when I was ill. A sense that I was no longer solid and that the most vital parts of me, my mind and my identity were unravelling. At my worst I genuinely feared they would be lost to me forever.
Exhaustion was an extreme experience but I'd had plenty of situations where I had over-reacted to minor stressors that should have flagged up my problem. I became scared and I suppose I just hoped it would go away. Had I acted on those warning signs I might not have been so ill for so long. I share my story because I want you to know, I understand how it feels to be completely overwhelmed.
One thing I have learned about overwhelm is that as a sensitive person it can be hard to completely avoid it. I accept it as part of life to an extent but these days I can detect its early effects on me. This increased awareness is a good thing. It enables me to limit the impact of an overwhelming situation. You can learn to do the same.
Your everyday life is overwhelming
Everyone who reads this post will have different circumstances but I'm sure we can all agree that life in 2025 has the potential to be overwhelming for pretty much all of us. Life seems to move much faster than when I was young and this is fuelled by the internet and social media.
There seem to be so many things to worry about: work, money, health, relationships, politics, the environment - and that's just a few off the top of my head. So if an average life has the potential to overwhelm a person, it's pretty clear that if you add in highly stressful factors such as loss of health for yourself or a family member, redundancy, bereavement, divorce and so on, the overwhelm is likely to be much worse.
Overwhelm and decision making
It makes sense that the more overwhelmed you are in life the harder it becomes to make important decisions. Your brain is constantly occupied with all the stressors you have in your life and when you present it with a decision or choice it's as though you've overloaded the system and blown a fuse. It may even get to the point where simple decisions such as "what shall I cook for dinner?" are just beyond you. I remember that feeling.
So if you present your constantly busy and stressed brain with one more task, your decluttering, it just can't cope. I hope you can see that in this state of mind you are far more likely to accumulate clutter because it's easier on your brain to just add something to a pile of stuff than make a decision about it?
What can you do about your overwhelm?
Some stressors are unfortunately things we cannot exactly avoid. I suggest you turn your attention to self-care immediately.
My recommendations include meditation and gentle exercise. There are lots of YouTube videos on the subject of meditation and in the early days I used these a lot. If you Google "Relaxing meditation" you will have lots of suggested options. Have a listen to some and choose one you like. Yoga Nidra is a special kind of meditation that requires you to put your attention wholly on certain body parts as called out in succession by the teacher. You don't have to attend a yoga class, these are available online for free. Try to do one of these practices at least once a day. Before bed is a good time.
The more you can get outside and into nature the better. Walking in nature, even if it's just round the garden always gives me a dose of calm. Spring is just around the corner, so let nature inspire you towards positivity. If your mobility is an issue why not tend a few houseplants of treat yourself to a bunch of flowers? Looking at foliage always lifts my spirits.
Self-care is not all about new practices it's also about releasing unhelpful habits.
Perhaps it's time to take a long hard look at the ways you choose to stress yourself.
Are you someone who gets frequent news bulletins on their phone? Do you pride yourself on knowing exactly what is going on in the world? When I was young it was simply not possible to be so obsessive about current affairs. A daily newspaper and TV news once during the day was enough. I have to limit myself to news exposure or I feel too much distress. I might feel guilty about that sometimes but it's more important for the planet that I am operating from my best self.
Do you spend too much time on screens? Do you wind down properly before bed? I always endeavour to have 10-15 minutes of quiet time as a minimum before bed. Just sitting in a chair and focusing on my breath. It's good to let the worries and plans of the day just evaporate. Do you mix with positive minded and kind people? How easy is it for you to say "No"? What other ways are you not your own best friend? If you walk around believing you are useless and never have any success, see how you undermine a whole lot more than your decluttering.
One big change is to know in advance what has the potential to be too much for you and simply avoid it, or tell the other person, "no thank you."
Impact of overwhelm on decluttering
You may feel well enough to tackle some decluttering and that can definitely be a good thing. Having less clutter in your living space will most certainly give your wellbeing a boost. Did you know that anything you can see in even your peripheral vision will command your subconscious attention? This is how easy it is to end up permanently distracted and anxious.
Having less clutter around will certainly help you feel less overwhelmed but unfortunately actually tackling the decluttering can prompt overwhelm! This sounds like a catch 22 situation but it doesn't have to be that way.
The trap most people fall into is that they feel inspired to start decluttering and they take on too much. They might decide to declutter an entire room that is full to bursting with muddled possessions. That's a bit like wanting to run before you can walk. If you are already overwhelmed the chances are you will be faced with way too many choices and different options. Where to start? How to organise things you need to keep? Really the hardest part can be starting. It's just not obvious where to start so your mind roams around the chaotic room trying to find a method and because everything is so illogical it can't settle on the best way to go about it.
Gently does it with the decluttering
Here are my tips for easing yourself into decluttering without ending up more overwhelmed.
1. If possible start your decluttering with a very small area like a drawer or cupboard.
2. When you've done a few small areas and have confidence in your method you can try a bigger cupboard, or a room that only has a small amount of clutter. A room where clutter has not taken over.
3. You could start by removing larger items first. When you know you don't need that exercise bike that's been gathering dust it frees up space and gives your brain more options for moving things around.
4. If you have some space try grouping similar things together first. When you have groups of say, clothing, books, ornaments, unopened mail, it will be easier to decide what you can declutter because you keep the best or most recent version in that category. This method enables you to see what kind of items you have in excess.
I hope you have found this helpful?
If you have any questions relating to overwhelm please do get in touch.
I work with clients via video coaching - one way I help them is by teaching a variety of practices to reduce and manage overwhelm.
Keywords: overwhelm
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